Sunday, May 5, 2013


Premature ejaculation, or ejaculating before you or your partner wanted to, is a common problem that strikes most men at some point in their lives. Several factors can influence when ejaculation occurs, but it can be controlled with some forethought or, in extreme cases, medical intervention. Here are some strategies for help, listed from easiest to most difficult.

WEAR A CONDOM>>>It sounds too simple to be true, but it works for a lot of men. Condoms reduce stimulation for most men, which should prolong the time before ejaculation. Steer clear of condoms that are marketed as extra thin. You can always upgrade to a brand that allows more stimulation later.Some condoms are coated with a slight numbing gel on the inside. This can help you put off ejaculation for longer without causing numbness to your partner (Just make sure you know which side is where when you put it on).

USE AN ANALGESIC CREAMS AND SPRAYS>>>There are two classes of these products. The first is the traditional "numbing" creams and sprays that have been on the market for some time. The upside is that you'll feel less sensation, which will delay ejaculation. The downside is your partner will suffer a loss of sensation as well. This defeats the purpose of the agent.

PERINEUM PRESSURE>>>Pressing on the perineum, a spot midway between your scrotum and your anus, will help to stop ejaculation because this spot reaches through to the prostate gland. It is the prostate that contracts and expands during orgasm and then expels the ejaculation fluid. Ask your partner to apply this loving pressure for you.

TESTES TUG>>>When a man nears orgasm his scrotum rises up closer to his body. You can delay ejaculation by gently pulling your testes down and away from your body. Your partner can also do this for you.

SLOW DOWN INTERCOURSE>>>If you're feeling pressured to perform, you might rush to ejaculation before you're ready. Try these tips for bringing your anxiety down a notch: Take climaxing out of your expectations. Instead of viewing intercourse only as a means of achieving orgasm, reframe it as relaxing, pleasurable time with your partner that you'll enjoy regardless of ejaculation. Discuss this new mindset with your partner, so that he or she can stop pressuring you, intentionally or not.Think nonsexual thoughts. If you notice yourself getting too excited, stop and turn your attention to something decidedly unsexy, like rush-hour traffic, smarmy politicians, or the old classic, baseball. Only dwell on it long enough to give yourself a short break from arousal, maybe 5 to 10 seconds, then refocus your attention on your partner.

TRY EDGING>>>Edging, or orgasm control, is the practice of maintaining a high level of sexual arousal while delaying ejaculation. It takes practice, but it gets easier over time. Here are two methods recommended by the National Institutes of Health to stop premature ejaculation

STOP AND START METHODE>>>Have intercourse as usual until you feel yourself coming uncomfortably close to orgasm. Immediately and abruptly cease all stimulation for 30 seconds, then start again. Repeat this pattern until you're ready to ejaculate.

SQUEEZE METHODE>>>Have intercourse as usual until you feel like orgasm is seconds away. Abruptly stop other stimulation and gently squeeze your thumb and forefinger around the part of the penis where the glans meets the shaft (or your partner could do this). After squeezing for a few seconds, pause all stimulation for another 30 seconds before resuming intercourse. Repeat this pattern until you're ready to ejaculate.
CHANGE POSITIONS>>>Some intercourse positions put less pressure on the glans (or the most sensitive part of the penis). Here's what to do: Try "passive" positions. Lie beneath your female partner, or try a side-by-side (or spooning) position.Avoid "active" positions. Missionary and rear-entry positions place the most stimulation and friction on the glans, so consider taking them off the menu for now.

DO PC MUSCLE EXERCISES>>>Flexing and strengthening your pubococcygeus (PC) muscle can help you exert more control over ejaculation. (Note that these are also called Kegel exercises, which you might have heard about women doing. The muscle is the same in both sexes.) Locate your PC muscle. Put one or two fingers right behind your testicles. Pretend that you are urinating, then try to stop the flow with a quick muscle contraction. That muscle you just used to stop the flow from the bladder is your PC muscle. Flex the muscle regularly. Try to do 10 to 20 squeezes in a set, 2 or 3 times a day. Do a set whenever you're bored or stationary — like when you're sitting at your desk or in traffic. No one will be able to see that you're doing them.Squeeze your PC muscle when you feel ejaculation coming on. Once the muscle is strong enough, you should be able to hold it off.

KNOW WHEN TO SEE A DOCTOR>>>If you routinely ejaculate less than a minute and a half after beginning vaginal intercourse, and none of the above fixes have worked, it might be time to see a medical professional. You can visit a sex therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist for help.

KNOW WHAT TREATMENT OPTIONS TO EXPECT>>>The treatment that your doctor recommends will depend on your age, overall health and sexual history, but here's a rundown of the most common routes:
TRAMADOL>>>A mild oral analgesic, Tramadol's been shown to increase serotonin levels, which can lead to greater ejaculation control.

CLOMIPRAMINE>>>A tri-cyclic anti-depressant, Clomipramine has been used to treat premature ejaculation for decades.

INTRACAVERNOUS VASODILATOR THERAPY>>>In extreme cases, your doctor might suggest injecting a vasodilator directly into your penis before intercourse. Though this is usually a successful option, it's not something to start lightly.


There are loads of things that affect a woman's sex drive. Some factors are obvious, while others definitely are not. It can be very difficult to tell exactly what the problem is, so here is a collection of sneaky things from birth control to ecstasy that may be affecting her sex drive.

COMMON LIBIDO KILLERS>>>The most common libido killers are stress, children, relationship problems, physical injuries or lack of physical ability, and illness. Libido is fairly fragile at times and relies on many different human aspects (emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual)to work in harmony.

CONFIDENCE>>>Confidence issues and stress are both major hindrances to a healthy sex life. Bad self-image is the worst offender, with weight issues topping the list. These are the women who always want the lights out and won't fully undress in front of you. It can take a long time for a woman to get comfortable in her own skin, and the best thing you can do is reassure her that she is beautiful and desirable. Find the parts of her you love (her brain as well as her body), and remind her how great she is as often as you like.

STRESS>>>Most people are a little stressed, but when it starts to affect your sex life, it becomes a problem. Stress relief is in order here, but how that is achieved is up to you and her. Take the bull by the horns, and provide a relaxing massage and a bit of pampering -- this will go a long way. Just watch out if she is stressed and tired because a great massage may put her to sleep!

ANXIETY>>>If she is anxious, she won't be randy. Along with stress, feeling anxious about sex for whatever reason (perhaps childhood abuse, rape or other fears) is a tragedy not only for your sex life, but for her whole life. She needs to figure out and overcome her reasons for feeling anxious, and the best thing you can do is support her. It won't be easy, but with good communication, it can be handled and eventually resolved.

DEPO PROVERA INJECTION>>>This injection is a high dose of artificial progesterone. This tricks the body into thinking it is already pregnant, but progesterone inhibits the production of estrogen, which is essential for the health of her reproductive system and, therefore, essential to her sex drive. The lack of estrogen can cause a problem called atrophic vaginitis, which can make sex painful and cause serious and uncomfortable problems with the urinary tract, vagina and vulva.

IMPLANON IMPLANTS>>>Similar to Depo-Provera, this implant is a slow release of progesterone that can last in the body for up to three years.

THE GOOD NEWS>>>Her sex drive may hit the roof (or the floor), taking you with it. If it works for her, it is a good (and sex-a-plenty) alternative to the pill. The bad news: This matchstick-size implant can wreak havoc with her body, resulting in a very high sex drive, but almost black-widow-like behavior (she'll hunt you down, screw you, then eat you alive). The side effects -- moodiness, obsessive behavior, acne, and depression -- can be very destructive. It also causes swelling of the brain. Every woman experiences different changes in libido, both positive and negative, while using this form of birth control.

ANTIIDEPRESSANTS>>>Some antidepressants can increase libido in women, while others, such as Prozac, reduce it significantly. There are some that have had fewer reported sexual side effects, so if one antidepressant doesn't work well, there are other options. Overall, antidepressants help encourage sex because she will be feeling better about life in general and will have more energy, but orgasm can often be delayed or not happen at all. In this case, good communication is essential because a chemistry problem can turn into a psychological problem very quickly. If you have to kiss and play around while she gets better, then so be it; pressure to have sex is also a libido killer.

BLOOD PRESSURE DRUGS>>>Most blood pressure drugs kill a woman's sex drive, so other drugs may be prescribed to counter this. The doctor may try a few different types of blood pressure drugs to find one that won't affect her sex drive. The reason for the high blood pressure needs to be addressed so she can get back to full health, and easy ways to help this are encouraging exercise and good diet, and doing fun, stress-free activities.

Saturday, May 4, 2013


Sometimes, a guy just needs some alone time to reconnect. Then there are times when we just want to get some satisfaction without having to seduce and take our time pleasing someone else. And so, I introduce to you masturbation techniques. Of course, I'm not suggesting that you begin masturbating chronically and show your girl the door. Oh no. But every now and then, if you feel the need to stroke it, here are seven masturbation techniques you should try out for a little variety.

THE COLD CLIMAX>>>In the first of our masturbation techniques, masturbate as you normally would, but when you feel the sensation of ejaculation coming on, grab hold of some ice cubes or crushed ice with the other hand, then continue masturbating to completion. The feeling of cold in one hand, heat in the other, and the sensation of ejaculating will enhance the experience.

RINGS AROUND YOUR PENIS>>>Cover both your hands with lube, and form a ring with your thumb and forefinger. Place it around the base of your penis. Slide the ring up to the base of the glans (where the head starts). Now form a ring with the fingers on your other hand and do the same thing. Keep stroking with one ring at a time until you climax.

THE PALM RUBBER>>>Once you're erect, place some lube on the inside of one hand, and rather than rub your penis with your hand, keep rubbing the tip of your penis against the palm of your hand to organsm.

THE BALL HOLDER>>>The next time you're masturbating and feel as though you're about to ejaculate, put your other hand over your scrotum and lightly squeeze and pull it down (or more aggressively, if you like that sort of thing). That way, you get to feel your semen traveling through your body, making it's way to the exit.

THE GENTLE TAP>>>Although you have to have a sensitive penis for this to work effectively, this will at least demonstrate that you don't if it doesn't work. Keep your underwear on and make yourself erect. Once you're at your fullest erectness, tap the tip of your penis with the tips of your fingers. It should take somewhat longer than usual for you to reach climax but when you do, oh yeah...

SCREW YOUR HAND>>>While standing, twist your lubed-up hand (whichever you're most comfortable using) so that your thumb is against your belly button. Wrap your hand around your penis and, rather than stroke with your hand, move your pelvis to pump in and out of your hand. It'll make you feel like you're actually penetrating a vagina. Okay, maybe not.

THE PLASTIC BAG>>>In your bedroom (or someone else's if you wish), fill a plastic sandwich bag with petroleum jelly and put your erect penis in the bag, squishing the jelly so that your entire penis is covered. Then, place your penis, still in the bag, between the mattress and the box spring. Pump in and out to orgasm. The best part? No mess.